Sometimes in the midst of the darkness you see the light, sometimes although surrounded by light all you can see is darkness...sometimes the only firm ground about your life wobbles, and trembles with uncertainty...and sometimes something new becomes a shoulder for you to rest your head on. Look at her eyes and I drift away, I drown in the warm sea of her eyes, swept away by wave after wave of tenderness and I melt.
I melt, the big wide shoulders that held her tight. The eyes; intensely brown, they saw right through her and the tenderness of his touch.
I let go of all restraints and slowly deteriorate and break down, I melt and I drown in her sea and we become one.
At the touch of his hands, as he strokes the inside of her elbow and her neck at the waves he sends throughout her body, the chills as their lips touch like velvet.
He lets go of his worries, like the sun lets go of its rays that light our world and melts in the watery embraces of the sea. It sinks in slowly enjoying how the sea brushes and caresses its cheeks. Its rays in its delight create a spectrum of all colors red signaling their approval of this love.
As the sun sets, making all the right moves, making the sea feel at ease, making this earth a comfortable place...touch me, kiss me, hold me tight.
The love celebrations continue till sun down, they go on till the sun is fully submerged in the sea, laying in the embraces of its lover, tranquilized by love and engulfed in a magically poetic rhyme. Then silence. The fiery flames of love that have burnt so energetically telling the whole world of their love, gradually it burnt; slower and slower till it was finally silent. But it does not die, no; it gives birth to a full moon.
Tell me not of the moon and how it lights my world, tell me not of the moon, and how it shines in his eyes and how it sometimes remains ignored, when he smiles.
Tell me of her smile and how it puts the moon to shame. How it lights the heavens and how the earth wakes up everyday just to have one more look. And how the sea gets jealous, try to copy the shining rays, silvery in the midnight blue of a cold night, sheltered in the arms of a loved one, comforted by their warmth. But all the sea can do is reflect it and gaze upwards, its waves trying hard to reach up and touch it, but it fails and as tide after tide is born, her smile still gives the world its warmth.
And the wind speaks of their love traveling all around the world, whispering to the people stories of how it witnessed it all. It carries whispers that erupt from the heart of the love stricken to the hearts of the envious. It fills heart after heart with warm glee, calms the souls and gives love itself hope after all when in fact love is hope. Had the wind not been there to caress the skin, had the sun not been there to twinkle in his eyes and the moon to dance on his face hopeless such a hopeless world.
The touch of her hands, the way she looks at him and the way her fragrance lives deep in his soul makes him smile, and how his makes her just want to bury herself in those arms, as close as she can and her nose touches his neck and her hands feel his heartbeats, faster now as he tilts his head lower the world disappears now. He doesn't want to move from her side, his heart holds on tight, nothing can surpass this, he can't feel any better. In this moment, he's happy...she's happy and there's no worry that can spoil it. He holds her hands and she hugs him tight, that where they should be for the rest of their lives.
He speaks of the word forever and she puts a finger to his lips...the smirk that makes her forget why "Sad" existed...it forms... They have the touch of love, everything they touch lights up with a feeling lost for a very long time, happiness. They inspire all that is around them to love, to smile and to forget. Sadness retreats as they embark on the world, beware treacherous pain, and unwanted heart break, for their love will cleanse the world from your likes, because now is all that matters. Now is all we have, all THEY have...apart from their love is each other. And that's all they need.
Monday, 5 March 2007
Saturday, 6 January 2007
Give my soul wings, for my knees are too weak
You enter a place and there she is, laughing out load throwing her head back and has every one's attention. The girl with grey eyes laughs a laugh that is composed of years of experience, that enchants u and attracts u to her straight away. For she always is at the centre of the attraction. Her voice is loud and no one seems to mind that, her sassy attitude just comes so naturally. Her outfit perfectly put together, pulling off heels in a coffeehouse. She puffs life into any party that has been pronounced dead by even the rowdiest and craziest party starter. She throws smiles and winks all over the room and strikes her targets hearts with sleekness that comes from experience, as she lights a cigarette and puffs the smoke in the air, and gets looks of admiration for it. She knows it, she knows that she's the girl in all their dreams. All the guys around her they all see the sexy and cheeky outfit she wears and the confident smile she has on.
They see the charade she has around her, but no one has come close enough to peel it off, and to find that under the tough bright surface there is a dull, mallow and weak inside. There is a little girl, stranded at her corner, in tears. There's a soft heart that wants but to love and take care of all those she loves. There's a mind not even close to the shallowness she promotes. There is a tear that always shadows her eyes, a painful memory at every corner, a nightmare in every dream. There's the ghost of her father haunting her every move as she knows it, she's disappointing him with her every move. She gets away with pretending to be indifferent to the loss and as his memory saddens her for he is not around anymore.
What happened after his death horrifies her and haunts her in every single detail of her life, the uncle who raped her. It's like there's nothing to lose and she accepts the challenge against the world. With every hand that approaches her to take hers, she sees her uncle's grotesque hand groping her, she sees his eyes feasting on her body, she feels his horrid breath on her skin and feels his presence watching her. She tries to run but it's anchored to her mind, like a shameful scar on her wrist and the cigarette glares at them as she inhales.
She's not beyond league- just out of reach. She is chained by dark fear and held down by memories full of pain and agony. She doesn't trust, she can't trust, she is living her own life as an unwanted and heavy stranger that is just passing by not knowing that in some way or the other, she does leave her mark. The unintentional sunshine about her while her sun rises and warms all those around her, it fails her and leaves her frozen inside and inhabited with darkness. For her light doesn't break through the maze of old memories, her warmth can't remove the icy pain that has frozen her heart and her feelings. She's the winter of her world, sunless days and cold,cold nights and she never seems to care. She just goes through yet another day with the black lashes against those big grey eyes and the perfection about her looks, small and fragile. Yet everyone thinks they know, she's unbreakable she sails through the hearts that worship her, while her own heart trudges behind held back by tears, pain and agony. They all see her as the goddess that rules her followers with her grey eyes and enchants them with her majestic beauty. If only they can see her from her eyes, see all the pain that surrounds her and the dark memories that have spun a web around her heart. If only she would push the darkness away and go back to the little girl she was, snuggled up and safe in her daddy's arms as he read her fairy tales. If only she would believe that it only takes her to trust in fairy tales. How can she trust them, when they all seem the same, they are all attracted to her body, they all relish her beauty, she is disgusted by all of them.
Then she met him. She met him and he held her hand and she could feel floods within her; it's the ice melting, behold the transformation of a heart from stone to rhythmic beats. His hands are not like all other hands, for they do not grope, but they gently caress. A single ray of light breaks through the darkness that has for so long inhabited her heart and it's only now that she looks in the mirror and catches a glimpse of who she really is. The eyes are brighter, the grey is not gloomy but bright. For once, she's letting the whole world know her true colors. There's nothing to fear now and with his hand she climbs out of the bottomless pit that she lived in. She sees love from a different prespective as a restoring and constructive force that builds and not the force that has ripped her apart. It all seems to her like the rebirth of the world. The evolution of a girl that hid behind her makeup and cigarette smoke to one that just loves her life. She sees the whole world much brighter through his smile and she is warmed with his love. Finally her soul has gotten wings and is beginning to fly. Finally. Now she can trust to have him have her back on days when her knees are just too weak to take the weight of the past. She rests her head on his shoulders and closes her eyes, for she can trust again.
They see the charade she has around her, but no one has come close enough to peel it off, and to find that under the tough bright surface there is a dull, mallow and weak inside. There is a little girl, stranded at her corner, in tears. There's a soft heart that wants but to love and take care of all those she loves. There's a mind not even close to the shallowness she promotes. There is a tear that always shadows her eyes, a painful memory at every corner, a nightmare in every dream. There's the ghost of her father haunting her every move as she knows it, she's disappointing him with her every move. She gets away with pretending to be indifferent to the loss and as his memory saddens her for he is not around anymore.
What happened after his death horrifies her and haunts her in every single detail of her life, the uncle who raped her. It's like there's nothing to lose and she accepts the challenge against the world. With every hand that approaches her to take hers, she sees her uncle's grotesque hand groping her, she sees his eyes feasting on her body, she feels his horrid breath on her skin and feels his presence watching her. She tries to run but it's anchored to her mind, like a shameful scar on her wrist and the cigarette glares at them as she inhales.
She's not beyond league- just out of reach. She is chained by dark fear and held down by memories full of pain and agony. She doesn't trust, she can't trust, she is living her own life as an unwanted and heavy stranger that is just passing by not knowing that in some way or the other, she does leave her mark. The unintentional sunshine about her while her sun rises and warms all those around her, it fails her and leaves her frozen inside and inhabited with darkness. For her light doesn't break through the maze of old memories, her warmth can't remove the icy pain that has frozen her heart and her feelings. She's the winter of her world, sunless days and cold,cold nights and she never seems to care. She just goes through yet another day with the black lashes against those big grey eyes and the perfection about her looks, small and fragile. Yet everyone thinks they know, she's unbreakable she sails through the hearts that worship her, while her own heart trudges behind held back by tears, pain and agony. They all see her as the goddess that rules her followers with her grey eyes and enchants them with her majestic beauty. If only they can see her from her eyes, see all the pain that surrounds her and the dark memories that have spun a web around her heart. If only she would push the darkness away and go back to the little girl she was, snuggled up and safe in her daddy's arms as he read her fairy tales. If only she would believe that it only takes her to trust in fairy tales. How can she trust them, when they all seem the same, they are all attracted to her body, they all relish her beauty, she is disgusted by all of them.
Then she met him. She met him and he held her hand and she could feel floods within her; it's the ice melting, behold the transformation of a heart from stone to rhythmic beats. His hands are not like all other hands, for they do not grope, but they gently caress. A single ray of light breaks through the darkness that has for so long inhabited her heart and it's only now that she looks in the mirror and catches a glimpse of who she really is. The eyes are brighter, the grey is not gloomy but bright. For once, she's letting the whole world know her true colors. There's nothing to fear now and with his hand she climbs out of the bottomless pit that she lived in. She sees love from a different prespective as a restoring and constructive force that builds and not the force that has ripped her apart. It all seems to her like the rebirth of the world. The evolution of a girl that hid behind her makeup and cigarette smoke to one that just loves her life. She sees the whole world much brighter through his smile and she is warmed with his love. Finally her soul has gotten wings and is beginning to fly. Finally. Now she can trust to have him have her back on days when her knees are just too weak to take the weight of the past. She rests her head on his shoulders and closes her eyes, for she can trust again.
Tuesday, 21 November 2006
A World Apart
She is a beautiful symphony of elegant and ancient oriental beauty mixed with a hint of sublime European lines.Like colors of a sunset meeting spices of the Orient; a fusion of classic art and contemporary beauty. Her eyes are two moons set in the midst of most elegant skies. That even he, the prince from the fairy tales she once long ago believed in, was caught bewildered by their shimmering twinkle against her velvety tan skin.
He would sit there wondering if she will ever be his, if he would ever be fortunate, not knowing that over there, on the other side, another heart beats and with each beat his love grows in her foreign heart and spreads through her being like wildfire. The short distance that had brought them close across a remote dimly lit hallway, the shortest distance between two being, from heart to heart; souls touching- a step further beyond delight.
They lit up the room when there eyes met. Sparks ignited signaling the birth of the deepest love a heart could bear. They both froze, the world around them ceased to exist for a few precious moments that lasted for a lifetime. They need not talk, for their eyes were already exchanging pleasantries and were already engaged in a deep conversation of pure love.
Then there hands touched. Their hands touched- liberating a million butterflies fluttering their wings-captivated. and sitting there next to him, alone-for the first time, discovering a foreign land. She thought.. what do i do ... oh what is there to do ... this is not something to undermine or leave emasculated- she knew deep down in her heart that this was to last an eternity. She looked down at her hands relishing his touch; a domain she thought was exploring but felt like part of her entity, she felt comfortable with him, like he has always been there with her. He let his hands go, they knew what they were doing, these hands they are hugging they already hugged before, these eyes that he is swimming deep in her warmth, have warmed him before. It's like their souls had fallen in love 200 years ago, awaiting their incarnation, promising one another, they'd pick the perfect two...a man made for her ; " I’ll pick the girl perfect for you"
Every part of him was in harmony with every part of her, He had fallen in love with her many times over, his eyes worshipped hers, his hands we born to hold hers and his lips awaits her kiss. His eyes fixed on her love stricken eyes and tells her, give me your lips and his hands pull her towards him and they kiss. A firework of emotions erupts. It rains and the rain hangs there around them, each raindrop watching the love in show in front of them. Each raindrop hanging there around them, not wanting to disrupt such a glorious moment for all lovers that believe in love at first sight. All times stops, it freezes, for they don't need time, it doesn't exist in the world the kiss had transported them too. Their souls touch and merge together giving birth to one being of true love. Every breath is a promise, to everlasting love...every breath a vow to eternal happiness. A promise of Eskimo kisses and bear hugs and never be taken for granted. For the both know, as certain as the freckles in each others eyes that...forever never ends- even at death. That with everything they do, their hearts grow beyond what were once known as limits.
An ear piercing scream of death, screeches from behind them. Waking them from the deep dreams of love they drifted of too. An ugly creature pulls them apart and punches him hard on the chin. It was her brother. He wipes the drops blood lazily dropping from his mouth. His heart breaks with every blood drop, and her eyes break down, her heart breaks with every blood drop of his, and her eyes break down torn between what’s right and what she feels is so true. One time after the other, her brother punches him- stop! Stop she screams ..."la illah illa allah, stop it!" With regret her brother mumbles Mohammad rasulu allah as her long lost love through a broken nose whispers "aly waley allah".
Suddenly it all comes into focus, reality strikes him hard, the world has come between them. He gets up and looks away and leaves his tears leaving a trail behind him. A trail of pain and agony, the world couldn't have been harsher or more despicably horrible.
He would sit there wondering if she will ever be his, if he would ever be fortunate, not knowing that over there, on the other side, another heart beats and with each beat his love grows in her foreign heart and spreads through her being like wildfire. The short distance that had brought them close across a remote dimly lit hallway, the shortest distance between two being, from heart to heart; souls touching- a step further beyond delight.
They lit up the room when there eyes met. Sparks ignited signaling the birth of the deepest love a heart could bear. They both froze, the world around them ceased to exist for a few precious moments that lasted for a lifetime. They need not talk, for their eyes were already exchanging pleasantries and were already engaged in a deep conversation of pure love.
Then there hands touched. Their hands touched- liberating a million butterflies fluttering their wings-captivated. and sitting there next to him, alone-for the first time, discovering a foreign land. She thought.. what do i do ... oh what is there to do ... this is not something to undermine or leave emasculated- she knew deep down in her heart that this was to last an eternity. She looked down at her hands relishing his touch; a domain she thought was exploring but felt like part of her entity, she felt comfortable with him, like he has always been there with her. He let his hands go, they knew what they were doing, these hands they are hugging they already hugged before, these eyes that he is swimming deep in her warmth, have warmed him before. It's like their souls had fallen in love 200 years ago, awaiting their incarnation, promising one another, they'd pick the perfect two...a man made for her ; " I’ll pick the girl perfect for you"
Every part of him was in harmony with every part of her, He had fallen in love with her many times over, his eyes worshipped hers, his hands we born to hold hers and his lips awaits her kiss. His eyes fixed on her love stricken eyes and tells her, give me your lips and his hands pull her towards him and they kiss. A firework of emotions erupts. It rains and the rain hangs there around them, each raindrop watching the love in show in front of them. Each raindrop hanging there around them, not wanting to disrupt such a glorious moment for all lovers that believe in love at first sight. All times stops, it freezes, for they don't need time, it doesn't exist in the world the kiss had transported them too. Their souls touch and merge together giving birth to one being of true love. Every breath is a promise, to everlasting love...every breath a vow to eternal happiness. A promise of Eskimo kisses and bear hugs and never be taken for granted. For the both know, as certain as the freckles in each others eyes that...forever never ends- even at death. That with everything they do, their hearts grow beyond what were once known as limits.
An ear piercing scream of death, screeches from behind them. Waking them from the deep dreams of love they drifted of too. An ugly creature pulls them apart and punches him hard on the chin. It was her brother. He wipes the drops blood lazily dropping from his mouth. His heart breaks with every blood drop, and her eyes break down, her heart breaks with every blood drop of his, and her eyes break down torn between what’s right and what she feels is so true. One time after the other, her brother punches him- stop! Stop she screams ..."la illah illa allah, stop it!" With regret her brother mumbles Mohammad rasulu allah as her long lost love through a broken nose whispers "aly waley allah".
Suddenly it all comes into focus, reality strikes him hard, the world has come between them. He gets up and looks away and leaves his tears leaving a trail behind him. A trail of pain and agony, the world couldn't have been harsher or more despicably horrible.
Saturday, 18 November 2006
Eyes that could give life (rebirth)
He sits there with cheeks chiselled with tears, eyes clouded, vision deterred, trying helplessly to cut his wrist. He sits there, scarred by the years, drained by the memories, haunted by the fears
he has lost all hope, he had given her everything and she has taken it, he has given her his happiness and his feelings, she took that too, and handed it over to someone else, and left him there, robbed.
To feel betrayed by your very own self, to feel like you are to naive for this world...when has the world turned into such a frolicsome place? When have standards changed, how could such a pretty face betray?
Why should he not kill himself, he is already dead, she has already killed him, there is no life left in him, all that lies inside is black darkness, wounds so deep that they torment his soul, silent screams echo inside him, a whirlwind of pain and hurricane of agony.
Images of goodbye, and a silent movie of the separation, plays-never ending. Why? Oh why did she have to leave like that? Recklessly speaking the words with no emotion, distant as she utters them, as she speaks of a decision she's made- alone.
The movie plays painfully, slowly over and over again in his mind, accompanied with a symphony of screams of agony and tears of a lost soul. Played by his ugly tormentor on the instruments of his torture. Emotions cutting deep within his soul, burning- raw. He questions all that is beautiful, he questions if beauty ever existed. He thinks that maybe, it was just him, his choice of viewing things that way, out of plain romanticism. He sees thorns, not beautiful roses, he sees pain and darkness in everything, the sun doesn't shine on him, the moon scares him, he crawls for he won't walk, its time to leave, come sweet angle of death, I open my arms and I welcome you in.
He thinks...how should i take such a worthless life, slit my wrist, take them pills, or just pick the highway... just ways of time, his mind is no longer clear. He takes that blade, and cuts deeper and deeper into his soul, lines that start closer to his hand and end up further into his arm closer...closer- oh come dear death. He feels his soul rising, and he sees the white light, he is reaching out for it, his fingertips going through the haze and they land on a face, they slide across, and he sees through them, its beauty again, its pulling him back, no please let me go he screams, but these screams don't erupt for he feels a warm surge being born on his lips that silences him and it rips through his body demolishing all the darkness inside him. Suddenly he feels emancipated, this touch on his lips feels familiar, and it gently strikes him, it is a kiss, the kiss of life. The sirens-they draw closer, and fade away, and closer again and he wakes up to a prickling feeling on his wrist, a needle...and a sobbing girl at his side...oh the beauty of life. He wakes up to heavenly beauty, eyes that could give life. He thinks to himslef that’s why he couldn't find beauty and only saw darkness, for all the beauty in the world has fused together to give her eyes, it was her lips that brought him back and its her eyes that would keep him going.
he has lost all hope, he had given her everything and she has taken it, he has given her his happiness and his feelings, she took that too, and handed it over to someone else, and left him there, robbed.
To feel betrayed by your very own self, to feel like you are to naive for this world...when has the world turned into such a frolicsome place? When have standards changed, how could such a pretty face betray?
Why should he not kill himself, he is already dead, she has already killed him, there is no life left in him, all that lies inside is black darkness, wounds so deep that they torment his soul, silent screams echo inside him, a whirlwind of pain and hurricane of agony.
Images of goodbye, and a silent movie of the separation, plays-never ending. Why? Oh why did she have to leave like that? Recklessly speaking the words with no emotion, distant as she utters them, as she speaks of a decision she's made- alone.
The movie plays painfully, slowly over and over again in his mind, accompanied with a symphony of screams of agony and tears of a lost soul. Played by his ugly tormentor on the instruments of his torture. Emotions cutting deep within his soul, burning- raw. He questions all that is beautiful, he questions if beauty ever existed. He thinks that maybe, it was just him, his choice of viewing things that way, out of plain romanticism. He sees thorns, not beautiful roses, he sees pain and darkness in everything, the sun doesn't shine on him, the moon scares him, he crawls for he won't walk, its time to leave, come sweet angle of death, I open my arms and I welcome you in.
He thinks...how should i take such a worthless life, slit my wrist, take them pills, or just pick the highway... just ways of time, his mind is no longer clear. He takes that blade, and cuts deeper and deeper into his soul, lines that start closer to his hand and end up further into his arm closer...closer- oh come dear death. He feels his soul rising, and he sees the white light, he is reaching out for it, his fingertips going through the haze and they land on a face, they slide across, and he sees through them, its beauty again, its pulling him back, no please let me go he screams, but these screams don't erupt for he feels a warm surge being born on his lips that silences him and it rips through his body demolishing all the darkness inside him. Suddenly he feels emancipated, this touch on his lips feels familiar, and it gently strikes him, it is a kiss, the kiss of life. The sirens-they draw closer, and fade away, and closer again and he wakes up to a prickling feeling on his wrist, a needle...and a sobbing girl at his side...oh the beauty of life. He wakes up to heavenly beauty, eyes that could give life. He thinks to himslef that’s why he couldn't find beauty and only saw darkness, for all the beauty in the world has fused together to give her eyes, it was her lips that brought him back and its her eyes that would keep him going.
Emancipation of Love
He looked her in the eyes and gazed a poem into them, but then hesitated for a poem would not do justice to what he saw. He saw fear, he saw yearning to be held, he saw the need for security. He saw a thousand sad stories, rivers of tears and lakes of misery. He reached out to touch her skin, not knowing it would give way to her soul and his hand went through and searched deep inside, ulliminating her inner self with hope, a single ray of light breaks the stalemate and drives through the darkness, a shrieking scream of life awakens the death inside. She looks at him; what have you done, for I was lost a thousand nights ago, as I had once watched my insides get torn and this skin I am shedding, has been tormented, this heart that is pacing, has been demented, these eyes don't want to cry anymore. She speaks to him of heartbreak as he blamed her of a festive past...why? He smiles and shrills are sent through her body, he does not blame her. But he spits at her past, for that journey was not hers to take. This suffering was not meant to break her. Be stronger for he has come to bring her back to life with passion. His eyes send a piercing look as his wide arms are inviting, come closer. I’ll shelter you through cold stares and rainy autumn days and my love will pass through u, and it will pick u up, rise with my love hand in hand, let it enrich your life, let it warm u and with this energy, rise to your potential. A further horizon, as he takes her hand in his, sending all the warmth through the fearful eyes...take me, she whispers, I’ll do whatever it takes...to make you happy, to have you with me. She closes her eyes for she need not open them, and she smiles for she her lips won't frown, and she cries but not from sadness but because she knows he is there to wipe her tears. Go free souls, for you have been emancipated by love. Fly free souls, for love is all you need.
The Beginning
“Oh so you are competing with him now? Or just me?” she said
“With anyone who dares to challenge me” he replied
She laughs, with a sarcastic shrill in her voice and a glimmer of evil in her eyes. Every feature of her face was leering at him with provoking arrogance as he beat himself up trying to outdo her. He vowed that he will not back down till he is victorious, he spoke of victory, like a knight...a knight armed in her sympathy and with her arrogance in his arsenal he stabbed her repeatedly with his witty, slick and fast verbal jousts as he found the chink in her armour. Stabbed in the back, she felt helpless as she slowly withdrew. But no, she'll fight till the last drop of blood shed with dignity. Still she lets her arrogance get the better of her as he continues his assault nothing can stop him now. He speaks of her arrogance as if he's surrounded with mirrors, our knight in shining's giant ego needs a reality check. Nothing can stop him now he thought. But in steps his conscious, is he turning into the monster that he was so gallantly fighting, shall he slay her and rid the world of her arrogance or give her another chance and get rid of his own. As it turns into a battle of egos, rather than words, maybe the walls are left with no mirrors after all. The walls are left with only ears to judge their verbal jousts, as blow after blow echoes through them and she covers her ears as she always does-reality hurts. She stumbles back and falls, she sits there under him, looking up to him. No place for her ego anymore, everything is lost. She now shuts her eyes as the flashbacks force themselves through her memory, how did she give in?
As she awaits her end, all time stands still and she feels a gentle touch on her cheek that wipes away her tears. Tears she didn't even know exist and she opens her eyes slowly to find an open hand. She takes it and rises slowly, and she goes from blatant arrogance to an emotionally poor wreck. She rises from the dead again by the sweet tasting nectar of love and she is humbled and driven madly in love. “C’est l'amour” she whispers and is gone.
“With anyone who dares to challenge me” he replied
She laughs, with a sarcastic shrill in her voice and a glimmer of evil in her eyes. Every feature of her face was leering at him with provoking arrogance as he beat himself up trying to outdo her. He vowed that he will not back down till he is victorious, he spoke of victory, like a knight...a knight armed in her sympathy and with her arrogance in his arsenal he stabbed her repeatedly with his witty, slick and fast verbal jousts as he found the chink in her armour. Stabbed in the back, she felt helpless as she slowly withdrew. But no, she'll fight till the last drop of blood shed with dignity. Still she lets her arrogance get the better of her as he continues his assault nothing can stop him now. He speaks of her arrogance as if he's surrounded with mirrors, our knight in shining's giant ego needs a reality check. Nothing can stop him now he thought. But in steps his conscious, is he turning into the monster that he was so gallantly fighting, shall he slay her and rid the world of her arrogance or give her another chance and get rid of his own. As it turns into a battle of egos, rather than words, maybe the walls are left with no mirrors after all. The walls are left with only ears to judge their verbal jousts, as blow after blow echoes through them and she covers her ears as she always does-reality hurts. She stumbles back and falls, she sits there under him, looking up to him. No place for her ego anymore, everything is lost. She now shuts her eyes as the flashbacks force themselves through her memory, how did she give in?
As she awaits her end, all time stands still and she feels a gentle touch on her cheek that wipes away her tears. Tears she didn't even know exist and she opens her eyes slowly to find an open hand. She takes it and rises slowly, and she goes from blatant arrogance to an emotionally poor wreck. She rises from the dead again by the sweet tasting nectar of love and she is humbled and driven madly in love. “C’est l'amour” she whispers and is gone.
Friday, 17 November 2006
A Leap of Faith
Like violins in the background of a bitter rock song, there's a detail hidden about her life. A stone that lies deep under the calm surface of her flowing river that once ripped it apart. A heart that has chosen someone else's arms as a home- rather than her insides, where it was born, and lingered there for too long until it forgot where its true calling was, and began to settle there. All the letters; unsent- all the cries; unanswered. Silent screams erupt trying to break the stalement forced upon her by the strange surroundings. A stare that is of a pair of glass eyes- paralysed, frozen senses and numb feelings, weary arms, but she lifts her palms for one last time. Her glass eyes stare upwards and pray with sincerity, a tear drops with each word, her heart prays too. Ohh most compassionate and most merciful lord I know I have sinned and I beg for your mercy. Shadow me with your blessings and lift this curse off my downcast shoulders. Oh dear God, I weigh ten times my body, my soul is in agony. Oh dear God please embrace me, bless me with your forgiveness, help my being elevate. Lord almighty, i am lost, take me in and guide me, for I have sinned. Her frail arms shake, her knees clatter loudly, for she is weakened by guilt, pulled apart by her own conscious. Then she is blinded, a white light invades her soul and clears her mind. Its obvious, an invisible hand shakes her hard. She can hear, she doesn't know what, but she can hear, one word strikes her hard, LA ILAH ILA ALLAH. Its the familiar call that she has always heard Al Adan. Over and over, it shakes her soul, time and time again, washing away the darkness of her heart, the sinful soul sublimes. It enters her and with each word she gets stronger. It purifiers her as the words echo inside her, 7ayaa 3ala el salaaaah, 7ayaa 3ala el falaaa7. It is calling her; come to your saviour. Come to your salvation. Come to pray. With hastened footsteps at first and then breaking into a sprint she honours the call. I am coming my lord, i am coming ooh most compassionate, I am coming oh most merciful. Her eyes, they shine- her face; it glows... it's the beauty of God shining through her, oh helpless human, what are you without your creator.
Allah wi Akabar she screams. Allah wi Akbar she cries and with every tear her soul gets lighter, and she prays. She finishes and she looks upwards. An unfamiliar soothing voice whispers gently into her ears as she lies there in the middle of the mosque. She is calm again, but she is still crying, and with each tear her soul rises and rises, "Tashahdy" the voice says, "Ashado Ana La Ilah Ila Allah Wi Ana Mohamed Rasool Allah". With the last tear her soul leaves her body. She sees herself, so tranquile so beautiful. "Ya Ayoha Al Nafs Al Motma2ena Erga3y El Rabky Radyton Mardeya Wi Adkholy fi 3eebaady Wi Adkholy Ganaty".
Allah wi Akabar she screams. Allah wi Akbar she cries and with every tear her soul gets lighter, and she prays. She finishes and she looks upwards. An unfamiliar soothing voice whispers gently into her ears as she lies there in the middle of the mosque. She is calm again, but she is still crying, and with each tear her soul rises and rises, "Tashahdy" the voice says, "Ashado Ana La Ilah Ila Allah Wi Ana Mohamed Rasool Allah". With the last tear her soul leaves her body. She sees herself, so tranquile so beautiful. "Ya Ayoha Al Nafs Al Motma2ena Erga3y El Rabky Radyton Mardeya Wi Adkholy fi 3eebaady Wi Adkholy Ganaty".
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